What You Missed On Glee

Season 3, Episode 18, “Choke”

If you’re wondering why Sue is helping, yes helping, the New Directions, you might want to check-out last week’s Gleecap.

This episode was hilarious, despite handling some serious issues in true Glee fashion. Whoopie Goldberg guest starred as the alumn and judge from NYADA who was proctering Kurt and Rachel. Kurt debates keeping it classic, but settles on being true to himself with a cover of “Not The Boy Next Door.” Since the episode is called “Choke,” and since Kurt didn’t

Rachel forgets the words to her classic standby “Don’t Rain On My Parade.” Dean Whoopi lets her restart once, but when Rachel goofs again, her audition is ended. Will she still get into NYADA? Has she applied to ANY other schools? Glee asks the big questions.

When Coach Beiste shows up at school with a black eye she says she got from a punching bag that punched back, some of the glee girls make cracks about her husband Cooter giving her the what-for. Roz Washington, Olympian and swim coach (whom Sue refers to as “Black Sue”), overhears and enlists Coach Sylvester (“Original Recipe Sue”) in educating the girls via what else? Song! The girls don’t *quite* get the message, turning to “Cellblock Tango” as a beacon of girl power.

The song triggers flashbacks for Beiste, who is revealed to have been hit by her husband. She admits the abuse to Sue and New Sue, heartbreakingly revealing how hard it is to leave since she’s “afraid no one else will ever love her.” The audience thinks she’s left Cooter, but while the glee girls serenade her with “Shake It Out” (which is maybe a little callous to sing to a woman who’s just been domesticly abused), it is revealed that she went back to him! BEISTE, NO! Glee can’t endorse returning to an abusive relationship, so something terrible is going to happen to you in the near future! Get out while you still can! Look what they did to Quinn, and she was just TEXTING!

Puck is one geography test away from graduation. When Puck tries to seduce his history teacher and fails, the glee boys cook up the most AMAZING scheme–though it is hard to see how it will lead to a passing grade, it involves Blaine hiding behind a bear shrub, so I’m down–which is cut short when Puck sees his father. Daddy Puck is looking to borrow money from his son, and the idea of becoming his father so repulses Puck that he agrees to a crash study sesh in the school. At three a.m. How is it okay that high school students are in the school at three in the morning? Irrelevant. They rock out a punk version of My Fair Lady‘s “The Rain In Spain.” But in the end–

If Glee tries to keep Puck on as a super senior, I’m outie.

Okay, I’ll probably still watch, but I will make “tut” noises. Often.

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