Figment’s Favorite Summer Camps

Summer camp is a place for watery milkshakes, massive bug bites, and bunk drama about who is dating whom (camp romance moves faster than a Little Monster calling to win Lady Gaga tickets). Honestly? We’re glad we’re too old to be shuffled off to a slimy lake and told we can’t take out the leaky canoe until we pass a ludicrous swimming test.

But.

We’d gladly pack our bags for a camp like Camp Washiska Lake. Perry, protag of Ned Vizzini’s new novel, The Other Normals, finds himself in a camp that’s adjacent to a fantastical land of mythical creatures, beautiful princesses, and heroic quests. It’s like something out of his favorite game, Creatures and Caverns.

What fictional camps would have us humming “Reveille?” Read on and vote for the camp you’d most like to sign-up for.

 


Camp Half-Blood

Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief

WE ARE GODS. Oh, just half-gods? ALRIGHT. WE ARE HALF GODS. Lava pit? Sword-fighting arena? If we have the blood of Zeus running through our veins, we will laugh in the face of such obstacles! And then will we still chicken out because lava? Yeah, no thanks.


Camp Holadios

hellogoodbye music video for “Here in Your Arms”

One? Wordplay. Hola+adios? It’s hellogoodbye! Well done, you! Also, everyone dresses like they’re from the 80s. As the great Tina Fey once, sort of, said, “I want to go to there.”


Camp Rock

Camp Rock

We want to go to this camp because it would help us make the connections we’ll need in the future when we are supermegaultrapopgods. We want to go to this camp because round-the-campfire jam sessions are so much better with a beat-boxer. And, if we’re being honest, we want to go to this camp because of the Jonas Brothers.


Camp Wauconda

Ghostbusters

Because, honestly, if you’re thinking of camp when a spell is cast that manifests your thoughts into a horrible monster and the worst camp memory you’ve got is marshmallows? Your camp was pretty swell.


Camp Walden

 The Parent Trap

We’d visit this camp just for the elaborate Rube Goldberg-esque pranks. Also: You get a free twin when you go to Camp Walden, right? Free twin with purchase? Hilarious hijinx available, price upon request? Buy one parent, get one—okay, sorry. We’ll stop.

 


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