Vampire Diaries Recap: Pictures of You

It was prom night on The Vampire Diaries and it left me reflecting on my life and my choices. As a grown woman, should I still be holding grudges against boys who didn’t invite me to prom? Should I be getting all swoony over Stefan? Should I be laughing for literally an hour over that “It’s a wrap” Dunkin’ Donuts commercial? What I’m saying, guys, is this show left me oh so happy, but oh so drained. So lets begin.

Vampire Diaries recap

In “things I can’t handle” past, I wrote many weeks ago that I was NOT having the moment when Stefan had to tell Bonnie again that Jeremy had died. WELL GOOD NEWS, this week’s episode starts at the graveyard (JK, terrible news). Bonnie tells Jeremy that “We did it!” is a pretty lame last thing to say to someone (I mean, I would disagree). But snap, she sees Jeremy alive and he’s telling her to wake up. Turns out she’s been dreaming and her house is literally on fire. VAMPIRE DIARIES TITLE CARD.

Vampire Diaries recap

At Salvatore Mansion, the boys are deciding what to do with Elena. They conclude that at prom they are either going to have to get her to feel some emotion, any emotion, and turn her humanity back on . . . .or they’re going to have to lock her up until they can think of something else. “Oh, but where am I going to get a cummerbund in time for prom”—said no one.

Meanwhile, Rebekah and Klaus are making their case to Elijah about why each deserves the cure. Rebekah: Because I want to be human, like, real bad. Klaus: I’ve got to get this boy Silas off my back. Rebekah wins . . . on the condition that she can spend a whole day not using vampire powers.

Vampire Diaries recap

Elena is Rebekah’s prom date! I ‘m lovin’ it! Caroline is trying on a beautiful rose colored dress, while Bonnie tells her that she’s worried she can’t control her magic without Professor Shane. You’ve got to admire the way this show mixes super serious conversation with super normal conversation. Elena comes in and admires Caroline’s dress. Then homegirl TOTALLY STEALS IT! Also, Damon and Stefan are her dates , which is not fair to girls everywhere who had to ask a junior to be their prom date. He was very nice. I wish him only the best, wherever he is. I’m just saying, I have some THOUGHTS about that whole Kate Upton prom thing.

Vampire Diaries recap

Caroline runs to Klaus, who is deep in the middle of brooding. She is royally upset! Elena stole her dress! His laugh in this moment is almost enough to make me team Klaroline (who are we kidding, I’m totally team Klaroline). He helps her find a dress from his collection of old stuff.

Vampire Diaries recap

Now we get to prom where an oh so sentimental montage of pictures plays on screens leading to the dance. Elena sees a picture of her and Matt from freshman year and it fully breaks my heart. And also hers. She pretends not to be phased, but she definitely feels something.

Vampire Diaries recap

Once at the dance, Damon tries to get Elena to feel something by calling himself her boyfriend. She destroys him by saying that she never felt anything for him, it was just the sire bond. BURN. Then she sees Bonnie and says that Bonnie is basically just a walking reminder of all the horrible things that have happened to her. DOUBLE BURN!

Bonnie leaves the prom  to get some air and sees Jeremy (NOOO!!! WE KNOW WHO THIS IS!!!). She asks him if it’s real and he says “Does it matter?” NOOOOO!!! NOOOO!!! THE FEEELLLLSS! They dance.

There’s no real way to accurately describe the passion, heat, and other synonyms I want to use to explain the scene where Stefan tries to get Elena to remember him through dance, so I’ll just give you this picture with Brand New lyrics (like I would have in high school):

Vampire Diaries recap

The fact that Caroline can’t be mean to Elena even though she stole her dress is lame. Like, I know you’re supposed to be nice to everyone, but there’s also a thing called “enabling.” Plus, someone totally wore the same dress to me at prom and I was not happy about it. Then her dress broke and she had to wear another one and I felt bad like I had done some sort of weird mind-willing thing to make it happen. The point is, it’s hard to be nice all the time. Anyway, Caroline and Stefan dance and talk about when you know you’re over someone. The cameras linger just a little too long on them (keep them friends, Vampire Diaries, please).

Literally before I could write “Heeeyyyy April, girl where you been?” in my notes, Elena was grabbing her neck and telling her Rebekah better be prom queen or else. She can for real not catch a break.

Now we begin the part of the episode I like to call “Vampire Diaries tries to trick you by making it so that everyone can be Silas” or “Maybe once you find out Silas can impersonate everyone, just like, tell everyone, because it could backfire on you.”

Bonnie discovers that “Jeremy” is actually Silas and she is not happy (and not yet willing to help him with the cure). She tells the gang about his shape shifting abilities, but too bad Caroline has left. I don’t know, maybe call her. It’s kind of important info, and they love using their cell phones.

Oh and they leave Elena and Rebekah out of the convo, but they totally hear anyway. Elena says that she really doesn’t want her brother and Alaric back from the dead, because then they are just going to always be on her case about turning her emotions back on. Therefore, she has to kill Bonnie. SNAPS!

So Caroline goes home and in walks TYLER with flowers. I could not enjoy most of these scenes because of how much I was sure he was Silas. Even though, it didn’t really make sense that Silas would care about Caroline. Also, it didn’t make sense that Tyler was there. BUT HE WAS! He was not Silas. This is not a drill. When he left his old house, Klaus was there . . . but he didn’t kill him, he let him run. PROGRESS!

Back at real prom, Damon is making all sorts of scrunched up faces and mad at Stefan who he thinks is still in love with Elena. Wait, JK, it’s not Stefan it’s Silas who stabs Damon. Stay away from the witch, he says.

Bonnie and Matt win prom king and queen (as if! Caroline was robbed). Elena goes to kill Bonnie while she’s posing for pictures, but Bonnie just goes all magic-y on her. Then because Elena’s mad at being bested, she tries to kill April. Come on! Can’t April catch a break?! She’s basically like Kenny from South Park at this point.

Jeremy/Silas approaches Bonnie again, trying to get her to help him find the cure. She goes all expression-y on him (guys, I’m not looking up the correct verbs for these things, OK) and he vanishes. Then Elena attacks her AGAIN! It’s like, I know you have no feelings, but at least learn your lesson. Because, for real, Bonnie once again goes crazy and tries to kill Elena. Also, apparently Bonnie’s blood is now toxic to vampires. Elena begs Damon and Stefan to stop Bonnie and they do. The boys realize that fear is maybe how they can get to Elena. So they lock her up and plan to make her life miserable. Good plan (sarcasm)!

Vampire Diaries recap

Don’t worry about April, ya’ll, because Rebekah saved her. Sidenote: Every time I type April I get the date on my Word, so people with the name April, I apologize for what you go through during the month of April. The only problem is that because Rebekah breaks her “not using vampire strength” rule, she might not get the cure. Matt won’t tell. But oh wait, there’s Klaus in the bushes, ready to pounce. He tells Rebekah that she failed and she has to tell Elijah what happened. This scene is cut with a scene of a happy Rebekah telling Elijah she passed and to give her the cure. Guys, I’m so ashamed of myself. I totally didn’t get that it was Silas. I know, I know, it was obvious, I’m not sure how I missed it. But anyway Elijah, gets a call from real Rebekah right after he gives fake Rebekah the cure. OOOPPPPSSSYYYY!!

Too much plot!!! Anyway, at the end we see Silas’ face as Bonnie confronts him. You only see part of it, but it just looks like he’s got some things on him face, not really like he’s scared. IDK, it was so fast.

The real ending I want to talk about is the part where Klaus gets a letter from Katherine saying that there’s a witch in New Orleans who has it out for him. Can we say: setting up the Vampire Diaries spinoff pilot Originals? Yes, yes we can. That’ll be what I recap next week!

Vampire Diaries recap

Catch up on past Vampire Diaries recaps:

Episode 18: American Gothic

Episode 17: Because the Night

Episode 16: Bring It On

Episode 15: Stand By Me

Episode 14: Down the Rabbit Hole

Episode 13: Into the Wild

Episode 12: A View to Kill

Episode 11: Catch Me If You Can

Episode 10: After School Special

Episode 9: O Come All Ye Faithful

Episode 8: We’ll Always Have Bourbon Street

Episode 7: My Brother’s Keeper

Episode 6: We All Go a Little Mad Sometimes

Episode 5: The Killer

Episode 4: The Five

Episode 3: The Rager

Episode 2: Memorial

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