Who says choice in denim can’t tell you everything there is to know about a person? And I mean EVERYTHING. Here are the 100% accurate conclusions about what your pants say about you and what others’ pants say about them.
Dark Denim Bootcut Leg
You had Cinnamon Toast Crunch for breakfast. Your favorite time of the day is 3 p.m. One time, you rode a roller coaster so many times in a row that you were unable to speak for the hour following the marathon.
Banana Yellow Toothpick Leg
You burped 30 seconds ago. One time, you chipped your tooth on an M&M cookie. Your life goal is to stay in a handstand for 15 minutes straight.
Light Wash Straight Leg
You have had a total of 3 dogs and 2 cats in your lifetime. Herbal Essences shampoo reminds you of summer camp. You stubbed your toe this morning.
Royal Blue Jeggings
You recently left a sticker on a t-shirt and threw it in your laundry hamper (and it ended up in the wash . . . yikes). Currently, you have a brain freeze from a Wendy’s Frosty. While on a family camping trip, a squirrel snuck into your tent.
Distressed Denim Matchstick Leg
You’ve heard “Blurred Lines” seven times today. You like the song, but you need a break. You run out of toothpaste every two months. You can’t find your favorite pair of earrings.
Grey Denim Carpenter Leg
Last night, you dreamt you were in a canoe that toppled over. You once cried during an episode of Futurama. You’re terrified of jellyfish.
Convertible Jeans (You know, the ones that zip off into shorts)
You get angry any time someone overcharges a cell phone/laptop/tablet. Your favorite color is mustard yellow. The ice cream truck just drove through your neighborhood.
Medium Wash Cutoff Shorts
Every Tuesday, you play Settlers of Catan. One time, you painted your dog’s nails green. You prefer a cotton pillow to a down pillow.