Facebook Finishing School: Photos Of Your Friends That Are Not Okay To Post

Back in the day, one could take a photo, develop it, and stick it in a photo album for later joy upon review. It mattered not how many people had seen it, just that the photo-inducing situation had occurred. But in this day and age, everybody wants to show off the people they’ve collected in order to make themselves look good (aka “friends”). It’s a free-for-all of potential pictorial embarrassment. You guys, we need some boundaries. Photos of your friends that are not okay to post include:

The one where your friend on the end looks like a manatee

A good rule of thumb with group pix: the picture is only as good as the person who looks the worst. If it’s one of those long table photos where your friend closest to the camera got screwed, be veryyyy careful. Karma is an angry sea creature.

Anything that would trip him up in a court of law

This includes photos that would undermine his alibi of having been at Dan’s house when he actually was out robbing a McDonald’s or something. You just never know when your friends will need an airtight alibi. Before you tag, check with your shady friends to see if they were supposed to be at that place with you at that time.

The one where it looks like you’re dating your friend’s boyfriend

I know the ambiguity can be good for your image — it’s been, what, a year since you’ve had a real relationship? I KNOW — but your friend will silently resent this image and remember it any time you do something remotely wrong to her. Not worth it.

The one at the party in which she had clearly just been crying

No one wants their photo taken after they’d been crying. Sure, sometimes mid-cry can make your eyes pop, but after? Bloodshot eyes — forget it. Also, if your friend was just crying, shouldn’t you be comforting her instead of taking pictures? It’s Travis’ fault. Go yell at Travis for her.

The one where it looks like no one wanted him there

You probably think you and your bf look really cute in this picture, but there’s that other guy being made to look the fool. He’s smiling in the photo, oblivious to his outsider status, but a Facebook resurfacing will only serve to shed a depressing light on his social life. He will never go to the beach again.

The one that would blow her cover as a Homeland Security agent

If you see your friend cavorting with CIA agents, don’t put it on Facebook. I don’t think the CIA agents with the fake names would want to be tagged, either. The fate of this country should not be determined by your “2013 Birthdayz!” album.

Any other photos you hate to see posted? Let us know in the comments!

Photos: Manatee image by Noah’s National Ocean Service; “Roommate Plus Boyfriend Pose For the New Lens” by Barb Howe.

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